Running out of wine on a total crap Tuesday … cat nicking our fave fascinator … losing a $20 lipstick — we can think of worse things than being locked inside Buckingham Palace, forced to fashion luxurious fabrics into tiny flowers or voluminous skirts.

Such is the plight of the potential designers working on Kate’s dress, shoes, bridesmaids’ dresses and other wedding wear. Rumor has it, The Dress Situation is so shrouded in mystery that anyone in the running for working on it has been given rooms in the palace to come up with designs for THE shoes, THE dress and whatever other fineries Kate will fancy on her wedding day.

Just another day at the office!

That’s one reason why Bruce Oldfield is starting to look like he didn’t make the cut – he doesn’t seem to be spending all his time in the palace.

Dora Fung, a British editor of Chinese Vogue said that one shoe designer reportedly in the running is Adele Clarke, who “has been given a room in the palace … along with another shoe designer.”

Another name circulating in the Dressgate rumor mill is Catherine Walker, a now deceased designer who had created more than 1,000 outfits for Princess Diana. Although Walker passed away last year, her design legacy lives on.

Regardless of who the lucky gal or guy actually is, it is supposed that Kate settled on the designer months ago, but that is hearsay from one Freddie Windsor – a chum of Wills’.

Um, “Freddie Windsor”? We aren’t totally sold on this info, considering “Freddie Windsor” sounds like maybe the most made-up royal name ever.

Oh wait, nevermind, he’s real.

Alas, our search for substantiated news on Dressgate continues, fair readers. We appreciate your steadfast patience!

PS: You’re hereby allowed to steal the name “Freddie Windsor” for your next hound.