Dear readers, brace your selves for some underwhelming news: Wills’ wedding wear is going to be less complicated than Kate’s.

It was reported today that the prince will marry in his RAF uniform. Savile Row tailors Gieves & Hawkes will put the outfit together for Wills, as they have suited him in the past.

Sure, they’ve probably got some industrial strength spray starch made from lion tears and unicorn smiles to make it extra regal, but at the end of the day, Wills’ wedding get-up is probably going to be less complicated for him to acquire than it is for most grooms.

And you know how that goes … nag your man for weeks to visit the tuxedo rental joint next to Orange Julius in the mall, steer him away from anything featuring pimp-suit flourishes or cummerbunds and make it out of there in under an hour — including the corndog pit stop.

(Hey, we said more complicated – not more glamorous.)

Wills & Harry, dapper as ever

By choosing to wear his military uniform, William joins the royal tradition followed by both his father and grandfather who wore their Royal Navy uniforms down the aisle.

Wills’ outfit will feature a couple bells and whistles, however. As a Knight of the Order of the Garter, he is expected to wear a blue sash with its attached star badge and he will also likely wear his Queen’s Golden Jubilee Medal, which he has received as a military honor.

William is serving as a helicopter pilot with the Search and Rescue Force (Sarf) at RAF Valley in Anglesey, North Wales. His official military title is “Flight Lieutenant Wales” — he graduated as a fully operational Sarf pilot in September of last year.

In other news, speculation over Kate’s dress is still swirling. You’ll get those details as soon as we have them, readers!

Getting Fit for the Wedding?

Fact of the Day: Mondays suck.

You’ve barely recovered from your weekend antics and find yourself waking to the seemingly sonic boom of the sounding alarm. You lie in bed dreading the obligatory smile to the boss as you rush in, scrambling to finish the report due at 10am that you procrastinated completing to attend the early-end of Friday’s happy hour. (It sounded like the right thing to do at the time!)

It can’t get any worse, right? WRONG.

As we hopped out of our bed and turned on the tele, we were informed by Good Morning America that it is rumored Prince Harry has chosen his date for the wedding. Thanks a lot for the great news, GMA! (Cut to toothpaste drooling down our face.)

Yep, ladies – Chelsy Davy, Harry’s years-long on-again-off-again love, has wormed her way back into the picture.

While it has long been known that Chelsy would make the wedding guest list, it is now being reported that she is also likely to be Harry’s date. Como, what?

We had just read not long ago that while back in South Africa on her gap year of travel, she has taken up with former flatmate and friend, Alayne Moseley. We had to go directly to the British media to find out. A source tells the Daily Mail, “If anything Alayne is a stop-gap. Chelsy’s real love is Harry, who’s desperately missed her while she’s been travelling. We have never ruled out a reconciliation.”

Another mole adds, “If she’s back in the UK the chances are she will be back with Harry. They are still fond of each other and are always leaving sweet messages for each other on Facebook.”

So why do we need that extra shot of Bailey’s in our English breakfast tea this morning? Well readers, we at UKate have long had a mayjah crush on the youngest Windsor prince. (Sorry Wills, it’s nothing personal; Harry is like a fine wine and only gets better with age. And well – he’s just more fun!)

Look, we don’t have anything really against Chelsy (but really, is she good enough for him?); we just like the idea of Harry being available. As long as he is single, we thought we might have that tiny chance of landing him at some point. Bugger!

Looks like we’re skipping lunch today to head to yoga – we’re going to need it to make it through today with this news. But hey, at least the sun is out!

Being a bride is tireless work.

There’s the decoding of the layers of disappointment in your mom’s reaction to your dress choice, which if you’re lucky ranges from the very optimistic, “if you like it, I like it” to the decidedly dismal, “… interesting.”

Then there’s the epic game of catty chess raging just behind the scenes among your friends in their struggle to plan the bachelorette party, which you have to pretend you aren’t privy to.

The centerpieces, the guest list, the 2nd-string guest list, gifts for the attendants … it’s hard to believe most brides don’t end up hanging themselves from a wad of tulle, foaming at the mouth from all the champagne flights and cake samples.

Prince William's coat of arms

While we’re confident Kate won’t have to deal with many of these common bridal pitfalls, marrying into a royal family does pose its own set of unique challenges.

Our favorite? Choosing a coat of arms.

What?

Exactly.

For loads of us, our most tantalizing brush with elitism tops out at redeeming our Fred Meyer’s rewards rebates. So, let’s explain:

A coat of arms is like a very ornate logo that represents your family or even just yourself. These designs were first used by feudal lords and knights in the mid-12th century. But eventually, coats of arms expanded to other social classes.

Despite a lack of regulation, “heraldry”, as the institution is also called, has remained fairly popular across Europe, where traditions alone have governed the design and use of arms. Some countries such as England and Scotland still have the medieval authorities in place that grant and regulate arms.

But where does this leave Kate? A prerequisite for marrying into the royal family is having a coat of arms. But, Kate has been so busy lately she hasn’t had time to apply for her own.

The process is a tedious one. Kate’s dad, Michael will have to lodge a petition with the College of Arms, which then has to approve the application before a bespoke insignia can be designed.

The entire process usually takes up to eight months, but it might be doable in two weeks, given the special circumstance of the royal wedding. It is also possible for Kate to just wait until after the wedding to apply, like Sophie Wessex did when she married Prince Edward.

Once awarded, the crest can also be used by Kate’s immediate family members.

In case you were wondering, Prince William has had his own coat of arms since his 18th birthday.

According to the Daily Mail:

His insignia uses the Queen and Prince Charles’s arms and contains small red shells around the necks of the lion and the unicorn, a tribute to his mother Diana, Princess of Wales.

The shell, which derives from the Spencer arms, was included at Prince William’s insistence. The motif has been borne by the Earl of Spencer since the 16th Century and was a popular symbol for medieval pilgrims. In all, the shell appears four times on William’s arms, the design of which was approved by Prince Charles and the Queen.

Diana already had access to the Spencer coat of arms at the time of her wedding to Prince Charles in 1981. Diana was descended on her father’s side from Georgiana Cavendish, Duchess of Devonshire, formerly, Lady Georgiana Spencer. (Fun fact: Georgiana was also something of a fashion icon. You can learn more about her tortured, yet stylish life and times in the 2008 movie, The Dutchess, starring one of our favorite English roses, Keira Knightly.)

Readers, what do you think Kate should include in her coat of arms? A gorgeous peacock to pay tribute to her fancy for fascinators? A regal unicorn sporting a party hat as a nod to the family business, Party Pieces?

Post your suggestions in the comments area below. We will see that Kate receives them posthaste!

Hello, Canada!

Holy hockey sticks! It looks like our friends to the north will be some of the lucky folks to get an initial sighting of William and Kate after the wedding. They are set to kick-off life as a married couple, taking their first official tour together in July – to Canada.

The Sun reports that the newlyweds will make a two-week jaunt to the country, trekking all the way from the east coast to British Columbia on the west coast. Canada is a member of the Commonwealth, where the Queen is Head of State.

Quickly learning that happy wife equals happy life, Wills is personally overseeing the planning and itinerary of the tour to make sure that Kate is not overwhelmed. She is expected (and has agreed) to do one solo event. According to the Sun’s source, “It is being viewed as a major tour and the first chance people will have to judge if William has chosen his wife wisely.” (No pressure Kate, eh?)

Royal aides are said to be agonizing over the details of the trip, as they are very well aware that the couple (mainly, Kate) will be under the microscope. They intend to, “reflect Canada’s importance within the Commonwealth and the work of its military.”

This will be the first of many regular overseas visits that the couple will make as representatives of the British Monarchy and is likely to set the tone of how Kate is viewed by the public.

We think Canada is the natural (and safe) choice for the couple’s coming out party. Canadians have long been fans of the Royal Family (and are a pretty laid-back lot). We’re pretty sure that they’ll receive Kate with open arms!

Cheerio, Canada!

Scilly Isles - Budget Holiday?

Forget sipping bubbly on a chartered luxury yacht, a-la “I’m On a Boat!” or taking an exciting African safari. It looks like our happy couple will have a staycation in Britain instead, honeymooning in the Scilly Isles.

Blame it on the economy – even Wills and Kate can’t escape the bite of the credit-crunch.

Britain’s The Daily Mail reports that Palace officials don’t want the newlyweds jet-setting on a pricey foreign holiday while other Brits are still having trouble paying the rent. Their source confirmed, “William and Kate are acutely aware that in these difficult times being seen to take a luxury honeymoon would not look good and send out entirely the wrong signal.” Bummer.

It had been widely rumored that the lovebirds would return to Kenya (the site of their engagement) or head to the Caribbean for some fun in the sun; instead they have drawn up a short-list of more practical locations.

And at the top of the list are the Scilly Isles. According to the Mail, Wills has fond memories of a family holiday taken there with Charles, Diana and Harry in 1989. (Forgive us readers, but we can’t imagine a great time with Charles and Di’s obvious marital strife – but we digress.)

The Scilly Isles form an archipelago off the southwestern tip of the Cornish peninsula of Great Britain. They have been deemed an Area of Outstanding Beauty. It is known for great sailing, diving, horseback riding, golf and tennis.

We already know we’re working with an active couple, so the Scilly’s look like a good match! Don’t worry Kate, St. Barths isn’t going away anytime soon and the Scillys sound super-romantic. We’re sure you’ll get your exotic holiday in no time! Bon Voyage!

We were just sipping some Earl Grey when our extended pinkies went decidedly flat at this news: Queen Elizabeth II has not yet met Kate Middleton’s parents.

Hold the cream cakes – how can this be? Carole and Michael Middleton have never been to tea with their in-laws to-be? The Daily Telegraph tells us it is so.

Though Wills and Kate have been dating for years, and the queen has attended some of the same events as the Middletons, it seems the ceremony on April 29 will be the first time she actually meets them.

Queen of the awkward in-laws?

We’re not sure how these royal family functions usually go, but we’d expect that there would have at least been an awkward get-to-know-you dinner at Buckingham Palace by now. A casual tea, maybe? Hell, a couple of pints and a quick round of Pictionary? Nothin’?

Royal spokespersons, however, told the Telegraph that the lack of meeting is not a snub.

“It is just the Queen has not felt the need to meet Miss Middleton’s parents. At present there are no plans for her to do so in the run-up to the wedding. If she chooses to do so, it will be a private matter.”

We wonder if this treatment is due to the Middletons’ status as commoners? What do you think: Is it rude that the queen hasn’t met Kate’s parents yet? Will the Middletons be made to feel like outsiders for the extent of Wills and Kate’s life together, and if so, is that just the price of marrying into a royal family?

Gentle readers, please tell us your opinions in the comments section below. And if you’re married, why not list your own tips for breaking the ice with in-laws? What advice would you give Kate? Do tell!

A True Fashionista

It is one thing to be covered in various fashion magazines and blogs; being described as an, “up-and-coming fashionista.” It is quite another to receive accolades and mentions directly from head designers of major fashion houses.

Readers, our dear Kate has arrived. WWD (Women’s Wear Daily) recently reported that the one-and-only Giorgio Armani has stated that he looks forward to seeing Kate’s future fashion choices and believes she is, “so discreet and straightforward, but highly aware of fashion trends.” He added, “She will have all the time in the world to become fully integrated into her new role and choose the most sophisticated and precious dresses and outfits for official occasions.”

The Italian designer would know; he and his Armani brands have dressed scores of well-to-do celebrities, socialites, dignitaries and royals for over 30 years. He was also recently selected to design Charlene Wittstock’s gown for her wedding to Monaco’s Prince Albert this July.

Another designer to put in his two-cents on Kate’s style is Karl Lagerfeld, who has lauded her look as, “chic, beautiful and elegant.” Lagerfeld has long been known for his work with the house of Chanel as their head designer and creative director. He also has his own label and is the creative director for Fendi.

According to WWD he claimed Kate is, “Better for the generation to come. She is very different from Princess Diana, and seems a very well-balanced and a happy person. She is chic in a way the position needs to be.”

We believe these designers have it right-on. And we wouldn’t be surprised to see Kate wearing more Armani and Lagerfeld designs as her fashion choices evolve (and fashion budget grows) in the coming years.

Bravo, Kate!

Prince William and Kate Middleton may ask guests to make donations to charities rather than buy them wedding gifts for their April 29th nuptials.

The decision is not final, but if it comes to pass, foreign dignitaries and VIPs will be asked to make cash donations to more than 20 charities Wills is involved with, such as the Starlight Children’s Foundation for sick and terminally-ill children, rather than buying baubles for the newlyweds. The amounts would remain secret.

Benevolent and stylish? This is why they rule.

Even with the plan in place, sources say close family and friends may be exempt and would still be allowed to give personal gifts. So, you know those grannie afghans and kitten kitchen towels are going to find their way into the royal love nest. Sombrero-shaped chip n’ dips? Count on it. Random golden knickknacks? Certainly. Between their commoner friends and family, misc. royals and celebs, this should be the most schizo selection of wedding gifts ever.

Considering Wills and Kate’s regular-folk lifestyle, we’re not surprised at the charity request. The British economy is not doing well and the couple has been careful to avoid ostentation. It is also expected that the pair will include the poor, the downtrodden, wounded servicemen and other less-than-A-List individuals in their celebrations.

Way to keep it real, Wills & Kate! Can we join the Commonwealth when you guys “reign”?

Kate & Pippa - Ready to Party

UKate has learned Kate’s bridesmaids are in the process of organizing her three-day hen (bachelorette) party. The Belfast Telegraph reports that Kate’s sister, Pippa, is the ringleader of the weekend of fun for Kate and fifteen of her closest friends in late March.

Drunken debauchery in Vegas?  Pole-dancing lessons? Thunder from Down Under with the ladies? Not for this classy royal-to-be.

“Kate was desperate to have a hen do, but a boozy night out on the town was never really an option – plus, that’s not really her style,” a source told the Telegraph.

Guests at the party are rumored to include several of William’s female cousins. Socialites Rose Astor and Emilia d’Erlanger, who are set to be Kate’s bridesmaids, will also join in the fun. The location of the exclusive shin-dig will be either in Balmoral Castle in Scotland or Frogmore House in England.

So, what is on the itinerary? Read on!

Day 1:  A weekend with the gals should obviously begin with a relaxing spa treatment. All of the classy ladies will be receiving mani-pedi’s from one of Kate’s favorite London salons. (Wonder if Kate will select the hot new butter London color, No More Waity Katie?)

Day 2: Now this is where the real partying begins. The Telegraph’s source indicated, “The second night will start with a three-course dinner followed by dancing. Kate has apparently asked for her favorite DJ, Sam Young, and a karaoke machine.”

The UKate gals LOVE karaoke; and we know it always leads to some drunken fun! We can’t help but wonder which music Kate celebrates when she rocks the mic right. Is she into the obvious 80s classics (Madonna, Journey)? Britney Spears? West Coast Gansta’ Rap? How we’d love to be a fly on the wall.

Day 3: The fine ladies will end the weekend with a formal lunch that will include Kate’s mum, Carole. William’s cousins Zara Phillips and Princesses Beatrice and Eugenie will also join the gang.  Kate will be presented with a gold bracelet featuring a charm selected by each guest.

This is where we detect a flaw in the schedule. Note to Pippa: you might want to switch the formal lunch to Day 1. Some of these ladies might be nursing a serious hangover (namely, Kate) and a formal lunch with the ‘rents and royalty (no matter how cool they may be) is never a fun time.

Here’s hoping that Kate really lets her hair down for the party. We’re pretty sure she’s safe from the eyes of YouTube; and with the Girls Gone Wild crew nowhere in sight we say – go ahead, take that next shot! Cheers!

Maybe next time, Obamas!

UKate first revealed to our readers Tuesday that save-the-date faxes are flying out of Buckingham Palace. We have now learned that the gauntlet has dropped and one of the first casualties of the guest list is our fearless leader, President Barack Obama and his wife Michelle. (So much for the White House fax machine burning the midnight oil!)

RadarOnline reports that Royal expert Roy Sheppard informed them the first family most likely got the boot due to security reasons. Sheppard explained, “I would assume that the cost of the Obama security would be unbelievably high and the bill would be sent to the royal family.” He added, “It’s a private event even though hundreds of millions of people will watch it, and the royals – and British taxpayers – would have to pay for the protection of the President while at the wedding.”

The UK Guardian has reported that Kate’s parents are picking up some of the tab, including service, flowers, “the” dress, catering and reception (Hmm…is this why it was kept to 300 attendees? C’mon Middletons!) and honeymoon. We imagine that assisting with the President’s security detail would blast their budget into oblivion!

To the Prez and First Lady, we at UKate are really bummed you were snubbed from the wedding of the decade. Consider this an open invitation (via Web, we are so green AND tech savvy!) to dust off the tux and attend our Windsor Watch Party – we’ll provide the drinks.